Bye Bye Strangelove

Nice to see DICK Cheney

being wheeled away yesterday

frothing at the mouth.

Happy Inauguration

Bearing in mind how that dawn on the Southbank turned out, with D:Reams "Things Can Only Get Better" blairing out, and how happy I felt, that yes things would change in this country, we would build a more free, more open society, we would try to eradicate poverty and concentrate on education and try to tackle the environmental problems. But Blair and then Brown have done none of these things and indeed they seem to have concentrated on making the rich richer and the poor poorer and this country a more repressive one. And on top of that we have fought a war on a pack of trumped up lies.

Bearing all that in mind I will say on this American morning, "Good Luck to you Obama," and yes I feel really hopeful. Now I'm going to crack open a cola. Yee-hah!

Vision Off

Tony Hart,

a presenter of Vision On has died,

a great teacher and inspirer.

15 October 1925 – 18 January 2009

as a reminder

here's the Left Bank 2 theme

One Fishy, Two Fishy

Deep Sea World in North Queensferry, I kid you not, has asked the public to help count the fish in its acquariums. OK let's give it go, "1, 2, 3, 4...oh fuck 1, 2, 3, did I count that before? 1, 2, 3 ...."

John Mortimer has gone to One Who Must be Obeyed

A great defender of liberty and the downtrodden.

April 21 1923 - January 16 2009

Parliamentary Pollution

Big Brother News Speak

OK, I've been ill, a severe case of man flu involving a lot of toast, tea and chocolate but sitting at my desk this morning, listening to yet another draconian, big brother, fascist (I don't use the word lightly) scheme for surveillance which can track people and cars using every cctv system in London.

I think I heard the above security expert say that we shouldn't be worried about this scheme creeping into other areas of our life as it was clearly stated what it was meant to do, and that is to be able to watch anybody all across London. Well that's OK then.

They've crossed the line from Big Brother to actually using Newspeak to hide and cover what they are up to.

"Yes, don't worry, it is limited, just to all of London and only the people that we can see with our cameras will be watched. So don't worry now."

This is another chip away at our freedoms.

While this guy, another "Security Expert" seems to want up the level of fear and paranoia.

Peter French when interviewed on SkyNews said that basically, yes there was a rising level of threat and yes we would need more surveillance.

Well, just a moment he's a security expert, what's he going to say? Oh no everything's OK, this stuff doesn't actually work anyway that much does it?

And also, anybody who uses the noun UK PLC, just discount anything they have to say; if they equate their country to some sort of business corporation where you have to pay money to have a voice in the entity and then only the richest will make their voices heard, well he's not going to give that much for the concepts of liberties, freedom and privacy.

Difficult to Believe in Atheist Campaign

Some people say they have seen these buses carrying the atheist slogan about there is probably no god. But I haven't. I find I can't believe in such things, they say if you believe you will see it passing before your eyes but honestly how can intelligent people really believe that such an advertisement exists.

Hun Ginga in Racist Jibe Slip-up

Prince Charles' youngest son the renowned ginga Harry Wellington Henry St Crispian Alamein Mountbatten Schleswig-Hollstein von Windsor may have slipped up with his matey paki and raghead joshing somewhat.

Still, he seems to be doing something more useful than the collection of offence merchants jumping onto this three-year old bandwagon.

Close Encounters of the Third Blade

Great story in the Sun about a UFO.

Are Aliens really out there?

Will they be like ET

or be

Extra Terrible

like in

Independence Day?

I was going to say this is another UFO,

an Unidentified Fat Object,

but I won't, as that would be rude.

Taking the Punch and Judy

"I have a sense of humour, however I don't find Punch and Judy funny or enjoyable. That domestic abuse can be trivialised like this is terrible. If domestic abuse was minimal or non-existent then yes, the jokes may be funny. But in the UK two women every week are killed by their partners. Making domestic abuse and misogyny acceptable entertainment will not affect all children's ideas of relationships, but it will condition some to think it's normal when daddy hits mummy. I don't want everything to be politically correct but we should be more careful about the messages we send to children about serious issues like this. Just because something is a tradition doesn't make it OK."

Sabre, London

Whilst enjoying as short article on the BBC site about Punch and Judy I came across this twaddle, the usual whiny attack on Punch and Judy making the mistake that representation is akin to brain washing.

It's a dead give away when somebody says they have a sense of humour; they don't. Then it follows on with the usual puerile arguments and when they say they don't want everything to be politically correct; they do.

But I really wouldn't waste space on this clod-hopping, box-ticking puritanism except for the delightful irony of the name. Sabre!

So when he says, it's supposed to be a boy's name, though of course it might be a lady writing in, so when it says "we should be more careful about the messages we send to children," it's OK to call your children, Claymore, Daisy Cutter or possibly Napalm.

The first symptom of a humourless sod is the death of their irony.